7 Tips for Talking About a Bipolar Disorder Diagnosis
If you feel ready to share your diagnosis with someone else, here are seven expert tips to get the conversation started.
1. Prepare Yourself for All Sorts of Reactions
Just as people diagnosed with bipolar disorder may have a range of reactions to their diagnosis, reactions from others can vary, too. “We can allow the other person to ask whatever questions they want, have any type of response that they want,” says Fast.
Although some people may react positively to hearing about your diagnosis, others may react in a negative way. “Remember that your self-worth is not determined by a diagnosis of bipolar disorder or others’ reactions to your disclosure of a diagnosis,” Dr. Quigley says.
2. Talk About How Your Bipolar Symptoms May Affect Others
During a manic episode, some people with bipolar disorder may be more prone to engaging in risky or hurtful behaviors, such as cheating or lying. This can be common for people who are undiagnosed, Fast says.
Whether you’ve just gotten your bipolar disorder diagnosis or you’ve received treatment for a new mood episode, it could help to reach out to people who may have been harmed by your words and actions during the episode. It could be a message like, “I’d love to talk to you about my diagnosis because I know my behavior impacted you,” says Fast.
But it’s important to recognize that not everyone will want to engage in this conversation, especially if they feel really hurt by actions like cheating or stealing, for instance, Fast says.
If behavior related to a bipolar diagnosis hasn’t yet come up in your relationship with someone else, the person you’re telling may have questions about how it could affect the relationship in the future. Be prepared to discuss how any episodes could manifest.
3. Have a Summary on Hand
After sharing a bipolar disorder diagnosis, some people may have follow-up questions about your symptoms or, in the case of work, any accommodations you might need. “In certain situations, your loved ones [or employer] may know very little about mental health conditions, so it may be helpful to prepare a short summary about the condition,” Ambrose says.
The summary could be either written or verbal (or both), depending on what you’re most comfortable with.
4. Work With Your Therapist on a Plan to Tell Others
If you feel nervous or worried about sharing your diagnosis with others, your doctor or therapist could help you come up with the best strategy for you for sharing your diagnosis, says Fast. “Share most of your concern and your worries with your healthcare professionals because they’re trained to handle it,” Fast says.
5. Understand Your ADA Rights (and Note That They Vary by State)
While the Americans With Disabilities Act (ADA), which prohibits discrimination against people with disabilities at work and all other areas of life, is a federal law in the United States, some state-level laws offer more protections than others when it comes to their own employment laws related to disability discrimination, says Ambrose.
“Given the complexity of work-related rights, you should learn more about your specific state’s legal statutes,” Ambrose says. In some municipalities, including New York City, Seattle, and Washington, D.C., there are local anti-discrimination laws as well.
If you’re in an area with less protection, it might be worth talking to a third party, like your state labor office, about the best approaches for disclosing a bipolar diagnosis at work. State offices affiliated with the U.S. Department of Labor can help you better understand your rights as a worker in the state you live in. The Department of Labor has a directory of state labor offices.
6. Offer Different Information in Different Situations
If you’re only comfortable disclosing the entirety of your diagnosis to some people and not others, that is your right. “You may choose to discuss certain parts of your experience with bipolar disorder and not others,” Quigley says. “It is okay to maintain boundaries and not share everything.”
7. Give Yourself Grace
It can be difficult to figure out how to tell others about your diagnosis. It’s important to take care of yourself during this time. “It’s even more important to cultivate a sense of empathy and grace for yourself during the process,” Ambrose says.
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